I waited in vain for an invitation to the wedding. I think it must be because I look ridiculous in a hat. There are certain people with oddly shaped heads who just look strange in them. Wills is one, His uniform, resplendent red, was offset by this huge cap which looked as if it was borrowed from a friend with a larger frontal lobe. Others had similar difficulties. Here we see Princess Beatrice, wearing antlers, or is it a langoustine, a young lady with a blue canoe on her head with her friend wearing a stork's nest. Mrs Parker-Bowles is either preparing for lift-off or reaching out for help and a spectacularly hatless Samantha Cameron, whose disregard for protocol was almost - but not quite - enough to make me want to vote for her husband's party next time.
I enjoyed that. I really must get in touch with my feminine side more often. (That's enough. Ed)