Stellar Drivel

There has, it would appear, been debate in the astrology community as to whether or not Sedna, a spherical spit of rock an awfully long way away is the tenth planet in our solar system. Arnapkapfaaluk is an Inuit word meaning Big Bad Woman and also a word for Sedna, the Inuit Goddess of the Deep Sea who dwells in the depths of the Arctic and protects the sea-creatures. According to Inuit legend, Sedna was so huge and hungry that she ate everything in her parents’ house, then gnawed off one of her father’s arms while he was asleep. Big bad woman indeed, not the sort of chick you want to meet on a blind date when Mercury is in retrograde, but anything involving big, bad women gets my attention. Sedna is presented to many men but finding none of them to her liking, she marries a dog. Not unreasonably, her father becomes upset, takes her out to sea in his kayak and tosses her over the side, quite an achievement with only one arm. Sedna clings to the side of the kayak whereupon her father chops off her fingers until she sinks like Leonardo di Caprio into the underworld and becomes immortal, her huge fingers becoming seals and walrus to be hunted by the Inuit. Sedna is linked to the sign of Cancer, seemingly confirmed by its zodiacal location of early Cancer at “perihelion” or ‘home sign’. To astrologers, Sedna’s influence is ancient and primordial. It is currently in the zodiac sign of Taurus.

As today happens to be my birthday, a distinction shared with the population of Cairo, or about seventeen million anonymous others, I find myself in retrospective mood. In common with the multitudes worldwide who place their trust in astrologers and other persons with the time and inclination to seek meaning from celestial bodies, I  thought I should review my life and progress in the context of my star sign, also whether those born near the periphery of a zodiacal sign share characteristics of both.  I am, it seems, firmly rooted as a Capricorn, or sea-goat. According to that well-known oracle of celestial wisdom, "I Love India", we sea-goats might, to a casual and superficial observer, be a tad curmudgeonly from time to time.

“It is very difficult to get close to a Capricorn man. He is always enclosed within a strong wall, which is not too easy to breach. He is not too gregarious & outgoing, but his personality traits include determination and patience. He has fierce ambitions, which he pursues with a strong resolve. If you look at him casually, it may seem as if he prefers solitude to company. Now, look deeper, inside his heart. Though he doesn't show it, he wants admiration as much as other people. It's just that a Capricorn male is too shy to express his feeling (sic) openly.”

Marvellous. How frightfully apt.

And yet, a dark cloud overshadows me. The horoscope is in disarray due to the gravitational pull of the Moon, and all the signs are now a month out of synch, necessitating the introduction of a new sign, Ophiuchus, wedged between Scorpio and Sagittarius. Were I to abandon the sign under which I was born, I now find  myself to be a Sagittarian, ruled, it would seem, by the planet Jupiter. From the same unimpeachable source I now discover myself to be...

“cheerful and optimistic by nature…sees just the brighter side of life, ignoring the darker aspect.” It appears that I am “ lucky in both, professional and personal fronts…very straightforward, sometimes to the point of being rude.” Surely not. "Sagittarian man believes that the nature of the person matters more than the appearance. …believes that looks can go weary (sic), but nature always remains the same. Innocent at heart and straightforward in talk, he is not at all deceitful.”

Hum.